Day: December 31, 2004

i went to bangkok yesterday.

as we landed i looked out my window. the tarmac was congested with planes, bringing in the water and supplies needed to prevent further deaths. the other passengers were an interesting mix: those who were meant to be holidaying in phuket and decided to head off to bangkok instead of staying home, thai residents returning home, business people, and the occasional pinched-face flyer.

i saw maybe five of them.

these were people whose hands couldn’t hold a magazine, whose mouths were slightly open, whose food went untouched. some of them pressed their feet to the plane’s floor the entire time, willing it ahead.

these people could be put into three categories: claiming their dead, searching for the lost, coming to touch the living.

because i had no luggage, i made it through c&i quite quickly.

in bangkok, an elevator takes you down from c&i to the arrivals hall.

so i was in perfect view to witness someone who had gone ahead of me in line, a mother, sister, cousin, friend, running down the elevator screaming with open arms to the woman who was scrabbling up the elevator steps. their hug i saw through my tears.

the woman waiting below i imagine was a tsunami survivor. the survivor couldn’t wait to hold the new arrival. as if touching someone familiar who wasn’t there could dilute some of what she witnessed.

i’m having trouble watching any more of the tsunami aftereffects on television. there is no doubt that live on the spot journalism and the internet has helped raise the amazing money that is flowing in from around the world to help the victims and prevent more death.

but it sears at my heart seeing their pain.

is it worse for us because we knew phuket? had stayed there? that we knew the maldives? had stayed there? that barring the tsunami we would have been in phuket in six weeks time for chinese new year?

i don’t think so. regardless of geography, everyone is mourning, feeling subdued, and sickened as the death toll mounts. crying when they hear of the kindnesses shown to tourists by impoverished and mourning locals.

my own 2004 was a maelstorm, a small agony. (Carys at left 18 days old – the worst was yet to come.) we were recipients of generosity and prayers as well. we were shocked to realise that people we had never met were praying for our babies’ survival and were emotionally involved in our family. if only the afflicted in aceh knew that.

through the tsunami of 2004 we learned natural disasters show no favourites as death and destruction hit the rich, the poverty stricken, celebrities and locals, villas and huts, coastline and islands.

and in 2004 we also learned no man is an island.

GRANDPARENT ALERT~

just about all our Christmas cards and accompanying letters have filtered in.

and i have noticed a phenomenon.

once people become grandparents, their Christmas picture alters from the ones of years past. no more pictures of them climbing ruins, in the congo line, walking in the run for the cure marathon. those slice of life photos have been replaced with their grandchildren.

have you noticed this?

and i can say, the grandparents (four this year) that sent pictures of their grandchildren IN NO WAY fall into the category of people you don’t want to be reading about. these are corporate, working-out, travelling types. they have great lives.

sending out pictures of their grandchildren instead of their activities over the past year, does not suggest a loss of identity. i think they believe: look at what we have to love. these children are not only the future, but a focus for love the grandparents have not had the opportunity to offer, or haven’t offered in years. and they want to share what they love.

i can understand grandparents wanting to share their grandchildren to all and sundry. my parents live is a very small CANADIAN (YEAH!) town, and a population of 18,000 does not provide enough admirers of the wee three and kindergarten boy. this means, when frugal blake travels, he always shows pictures of sebastian, carys, sela and jasper to the weary airport security folk before finally showing his own passport photos. (to be fair, i think he skipped that stunt when travelling throughout vietnam, but i will ask.) you have to admire them.

this is no hardship for me. i like seeing the offspring of friends i may no longer be in touch with, but have known since they were the size of the grandchildren now beaming down at me from my fridge. i like looking for resemblances and admiring sweet outfits.

but, to all you excellent, active grandparents out there, PLEASE REALISE YOU ARE STILL OUR ROLE MODELS. WE WANT TO SEE YOU, pictures of your hikes, trips, parties, lives….so an early request for next year….how about a picture of you with the baby? we’d love to see you teaching baby to salsa, read, laugh and bake…just like you taught us when we were lucky enough to be in your homes, worlds and arms.