fly away home
tomorrow i am leaving for canada.
today has been a pretty frantic day, trying to take care of last minute details and show my mum and dad everything they need to know about running the house for the next few days.
i have no problems with leaving my kids. charles and i left sebastian alone for romantic weekend jaunts when he was just a poppet, and right after the triplets were released from the nicu i went to india with charles for five days of walking numbly through the streets of bangalore, a city i now detest for several reasons.
but this time, it is tough to leave the kids. they are not pulling guilt trips, there are no tears or beggings to take them. they’re fine, i’m not. i haven’t left the kids for so long, it’s not in my groove. i’m no longer the mum who leaves her kids for funky getaways. i’m much more staid.
this morning, right after carys had shuffled out of bed, i offered her sanctuary in my room. we cuddled for a while and whispered about silly things, and then i said to her, "kitten, did you know that tomorrow mummy will be taking the airplane?" and she smiled and said, "yes". i tried to explain to her that mummy would miss her very much, but my little flaxen haired darling just smiled and shushed me because she wanted to sing the theme song from bob the builder which was on the telly.
tonight as jasper was brushing his teeth, i went over to him and reminded him, "jasper, tomorrow mummy will go on the airplane, right honey?" and he said, "but i want you to brush my teeth NOW!"
oh these kids will not miss me much. but i am going to miss them A LOT! they are incredibly naughty and frustrating and hands on, but so very fascinating.
remind me and i will try to tell you about frugal blake’s aborted birthday party. oh the tears.
