never will i roam? but i love roaming!
after seeing rod the bod (more like grasshopper!) in concert, i have had several of his tunes rolling through my head. in particular over these past two weeks as i have unpacked suitcases and gotten used to my new home and reflected on my summer in canada and the loved ones we saw there, i think of
RIVER OF MY HEART
oh the river of my heart is beating like a drum
with the words i love you rolling from my tongue
never will i roam for i know my place is home
where the ocean meets the sky i'll be sailing
now my inlaws are probably and rightfully laughing at the concept of me sailing, so let's skip that last line and let them have the last laugh. (tess = not talented at group sailing).
as i have moved from room to room (always with arms full) i have sang this song repeatedly. i sing the bit about "i love you" to my kids, and i sing the bit about my heart "beating like a drum" to myself when i am out on the hills. as i unpack, i sing, "never will i roam, for i know my place is home". and then i always stop. not because i don't want my relatives to laugh at me (and they probably wouldn't), but because after a summer in canada both charles and i find ourselves predictably, saying, "where is home?"
we know the answer of course. home is here. with the snakes. the wetmarkets. the kids! in 4d.
but right now, it seems so far away. separate from relatives, who in general live close together. and then there's us. it isn't much consolation that our parents moved away from their parents. we know they get it. this is home. both countries make my eyes water and my lips curve upwards. both countries make me shake my head with frustration. but for now, this is home.
listening to the rest of the song, i realise it isn't about nationality. (rod stewart himself lives most of the year in the states.) he describes a girl he remembers, and he describes a person basically living in a void. so this song is about people. if the river of my heart is geographically far away from the people i love (and not so far away from many others i do love!) then i know who they are, and they still know me. i can still call them, from any room, from any street, and i will know home.
