a while ago, i had an email from a friend who has having trouble conceiving. her secondary infertility was a specific sort, and so i put her on to a tres cool fellow blogger (who has yet to have kidlets) with the same issue.
said friend has now started her own blog. has linked our mutual friend and listed her under her "i’m loving it" reading list. yours truly is absent from the list. there are other bloggers with children on the list (as well as tertia, she is prerequisite!) but mine is not there. i didn’t even have to ask the friend why, she wrote me and said that she is focusing on "edgy" blogs.
i apparently, am edge-free.
but i suppose that could be true.
i don’t have the time to craft brilliance and cleverness. (i’m not saying others don’t have the time either, it may just come faster to them.) such is life. is the point of my blog to be clever and edgy? it would be a nice benefit, i suppose, but aspects of my life are not edgy. holidays are making me frantic. vomit coats my potential edginess.
other times, it is a stretch for me even to be sarcastic, because when i am writing about my suburbian hong kong existence, i recollect the love i felt, and that love overwhelms even my ever present sarcasm.
i thought love was supposed to make you gain weight. i never knew it whittled away your edges.
gal pal, i guess im staying off your "i’m loving it" list, because i’m too busy loving them.
Reader interactions
32 Replies to “”
Okay…that’s a bit weird, honestly. I love your blog…it’s well-written, honest and yes, it’s edgy at time. Sure you might not be writing provocative things just to get people to get all in a lather, but I look forward to your posts each day.
As for your friend who cant realise the true meaning of a friend…its her loss. How sad that her life is reduced to parasiting info and support out of others (when dealing with her own fertility issues).. without being able to thank those who were there in the beginning for her…
Her great blogging adventures will come acrashing when people realize that she has nothing but edgy shallowness to contribute.
Sad indeed…
I love your style of blogging and will continue to enjoy reading your honest and “less edgy” installments.
All the best..
Mr. L
Hmm….this is a vedddddy interesting post. I wonder if she read your mock responses to people’s stupid questions regarding the triplets a few weeks ago? “You don’t have to have triplets to commit suicide” was one of the funniest things I have read in a long time!
Perhaps she is in anger mode, and the edginess that she appreciates resonates with her own emotions. Having overdosed on ‘bitter/edgy/oh-how-life-sucks’ blogs that are usually sooooo self-defeating – yours is so refreshing as it’s always funny, wise, grateful, accepting (though not necessarily ecstatic) about the some of the challenges we may face.
Maybe she doesn’t know much optimism, love and hope plays a part of a good life. Life can be sharp enough, why add edges?
I think it is kind of funny that she thinks her blogroll is THAT important. Jeez, who does she think she is? Unless she suddenly joined this blogworld with such a bang and get 5K hits every day, who the f is reading it anyway? Does Tertia really care if she’s on yet another blogroll? I kinda doubt it; she has plenty of exposure. And I think that is the deal. She is affiliating herself for what she sees as maximum exposure. Dumping friends (even virtual ones) isn’t the way to accomplish that, particularly b/c EVERYONE reads Tess!
WhatEVER. *said in Cher Horowitz, of Clueless fame, voice*
You can be edge free all the time or all edge and it won’t mean a hill of beans (technical term) difference to me. I’m addicted to what you write and find it moves me and my heart & soul all the time. And when it isn’t doing that, it is taking me on trips in my mind’s eye. I’m experiencing your life the way you live it, and I love it.
Don’t go changing to try to please ___, I love you just the way you are.
Personally, I think that your less ‘edgy’ approach to life and parenting helps me to approach parenting my own children with less edginess and exhaustion. You are a breath of fresh air, and you help me realize that ‘this too, shall pass’ on those days when it seems like it couldn’t possibly.
Thank you for your un-edginess, Tess. If I knew how to blogroll, I’d put you on mine!
I love your blog. But you already know that. It’s real. It’s real life. You write what’s on your mind and go with it.
I see I’m now on your badge of courage list, : ) Thanks Tess. : )
By the way, where are your connections (cities) when you fly out for your holidays?
You’re site is on my “I’m loving it” list. Seriously… just look at my site. I like to read your site. First found you through Tertia’s site.
You rate high on my Favorites list. Does that count??
Okay, maybe this person has a different idea of edgy. I think raising triplets with an older son is VERY edgy. I love your blog. I read a couple more and yes they start comments on politics, war, etc… but nothing is more edgy then four kids and three of them just one year old. Big Hugs!!!
i’m not her blog roll either. not that i know her, but i’m not on any blog rolls, so do the math.
personally, i’ve been a Tess fan for years. way back on ttc you always used to make me laugh. i worship your wit, charm, and grace. i am used chewing gum on the sidewalk outside your building, but i want to be, because i know you will be walking on this sidewalk someday and maybe, just maybe, if i’m lucky, i’ll get stuck to your shoe.
love ya!
I take you everywhere I go. I love your blog, I love the people who comment here, I love reading about a life so very different from my own. Edgy smedgy, friends are what matter to me.
Lela took the words right out of my typing fingers..”edgy smegdy”…if it helps you are on my list…but too bad blogger spot is jacked up and doesn’t take you there…so sorry!!! Id rather have open, fun loving, honest, great tips about a place you LOVE living…and wonderful picutres and stories about your journey with infertility, triplets and being the awesome wife, mother and freind that you are to sooooooooooooo many people here and ’round the world and in cyberspace!!!! Edgy…sarcasm isn’t all its cracked up to be anyway….xo lyns
I don’t read Tertia because she’s “edgy”, but because the best of her posts are a wonderful exploration of her emotional journey through IF, parenting, marriage, friendship and life in general. I read your blog for the same reasons, and love your thoughtful, loving, conscientious and ethical reflections on your life with your family. And sometimes you are very funny too, a great bonus!
Keep on sharing your own feelings and your own words, and who cares about being “edgy”, or fashionable, or whatever.
I don’t even know what to say to this, some people do take themselves too seriously.Edgy you’re not? Has she taken the time to even read you? There are some blogs i can’t even get close to bcs they’re so edgy it cuts you. then tehre are blogs like yours, where everything fits perfectly, you, your family, your life, the place you chose to call home. You can be sad, worried, hysterically funny or just bitchy, doesn’t matter. You write honestly, and that’s what got us addicted.
She sounds like a real twat, and an ungrateful one at that. Good riddance.
Delurking. I have you bookmarked and read you regularly. Maybe I should start a blog category called “I Don’t Know How She Does It”. (But I hate categories, so I hope you don’t mind if I just add you to my jumbly list). I read you because I’m in awe of your super powers and the fact that you seem to be so utterly sane.
Tess –
In my opinion, blogs are about life. And your blog is about your life – as it should be! I LOVE the way you write and I will continue reading as long as you continue writing.
You are one of the reasons I started my blog….and you ARE on my blog role!
I love you Tess!
Karen
lioness,
you took the word right out of my mouth. 🙂
Tess, I love your blogs, dont ever change,,, as for this “friend”, she will learn a small lesson from life called “Do unto others”.
Auntie P
I read your blog because you are honest. That’s what I like about Tertia too- and the other people I’ve linked to. I can’t even ‘lump’everyone on my blog roll into a singular category- except ‘fascinating’ IMHO.
I just don’t get it. My first blog roll supported my friends IRL who blog. Now, my further developed blogroll supports my IRL friends and my cyberbuddies. I couldn’t imagine it any other way.
You know I adore you (and MC…alot!)but I thought I should put it in writing! I kind of like that your blog never sounds rehearsed…or that you have left some important detail out so you could keep the peace…and on & on. You are such a gift to everyone that reads you. You are my first stop every day. And then off to see what your husband has to say! And Tertia is 3rd. I don’t put her first just to spite her. LOL!
Hmm……I will take “real” over “edgy” any day. And what is
edgy” anyways???
xoxo
That’s one of the things I love about your blog — the lack of edginess. Edginess often equates to trying too hard to be outrageous and that can get tiresome.
Liz
Tess,
Glad you are living in the real world, not the world of edge or sarcasm. You, MC, Tertia, Janis and Tatiana are my faves, because you let us know what is going on, not some “idea” of what you think we would like to read. Does this make sense?
Remember the advise you probably got as a teen from your Mum (I both rec’d it and gave it to my daughter) “Never change who you are to please others. Always be yourself.”
Love ya,
Louise
Tess,
Glad you are living in the real world, not the world of edge or sarcasm. You, MC, Tertia, Janis and Tatiana are my faves, because you let us know what is going on, not some “idea” of what you think we would like to read. Does this make sense?
Remember the advise you probably got as a teen from your Mum (I both rec’d it and gave it to my daughter) “Never change who you are to please others. Always be yourself.”
Luv ya just the way you are,
Louise
oops, sorry, posted twice with the change….
Ditto what Karyn said. I love reading your blog because I can RELATE to you (despite not having triplets) and your everyday experiences. Truth be told, apart from Tertia’s blog, I don’t enjoy the “edgy” ones. Please don’t change.
I read your post (I’ve been a lurker), and don’t care a bit that it’s not edgy. It’s honest, and THAT is what counts.
Tess-Your blog is the first one I read when I read the blogs on my “I’m loving it” list. Plus, triplets and Sebastian have got to be enough edge for anyone! She obviously doesn’t appreciate the part of you that you share with all of us. Personally, I just hope you have time to post when you are on vacation (athough I’m sure you’ll have other more important and fun things to do!).
Hi Tess
I just worked out your connection. What a small small world!
Ok, so I am late to this post. See, now you have found me out that I am not reading blogs on a regular basis, but I have a valid excuse! Promise!!
Wooohooo, I am edgy!! I have no idea what that means, but I shall call myself that all the time now. Tertia = Edgy. Tertia = Edgy Winner. Tertia = Edgy G&D.
Do you think it is because I say ‘f#ck’ a lot?
Edge smege – I enjoy your blog because you are such a great writer.
Tess
I learned about your blog from my sister, your friend Tracey (MacLe….). I am compelled to write because the edgy comment was just too much to lurk through. Here are a few digestives:
1). She’s dead wrong. What is not edgy about true stream of consciousness, joy and pain, laughs and harumphs?
2). Those fantastic photos of the guys in the pool, launching the little nudes into the air (loved the ivy leaves, nice touch!)… what is not edgy about skinny-dipping at night well past bed-time??
3). Does the edge-police-woman work in Advertising? Just wondering because I used to and some of the ad-folks get a bit too trained on trying to write their lives like a “creative brief” with the “look and feel” that will win awards … sadly this phenom usually applies to ALL aspects of said lives, not just their blogs. If this was five years ago you’d be expected to be a current hipster, ten years before that you’d be expected to be thinking outside of the box (what box, where? This one is dumb in so many ways). Sounds a bit too much like she’s doing some Strategy and Branding on her blog. How unfortunate… must be exhausting staying up to date on all things edgy in this age of so many choices. Knowing that there are self-appointed-edge-police makes me want to wear bright pink jelly shoes with red socks, black stirrup pants and a Frankie Says RELAX t-shirt…with red and pink earrings/hairband/requisite huge ESPRIT bag.
4). She simply cannot see that the edgesters she’s trying to impress, would luuurve your blog grrrrl. Are repeated consonants still edgy? I have not checked, so not sure if that joke will pass. True edge-dwellers don’t need to police the edge…it is too fluid, too esoteric. hehe.
5). Hopefully the edge-ster will eat a big edgy crow on this one, and “get right” on her perspective of where the edge actually exists…in her head. Your blog is exceptional, and you are a cyber star, don’t forget it! You rock, completely, on the edge.
6). I’ve never thanked you for the posts, so let this be my thanks. Keep on keeping on, she’s just wrong. Don’t second guess your writing, your style, your creativity … Tess, you are uber-cool.
7). Edgy is so 1999.
xo Suzanne Elise