grandad blake’s birthday

even though i am not back in hong kong yet (my flight leaves in 9 hours), let me tell you about grandad blake (who is in hong kong right now) and his 64th birthday party in hong kong a few days before i left.

his birthday fell over the chinese new year weekend. we had a very low key event planned – kids, mum, myself and our dear friend sandi heading over to the boat club for dinner. and then zoom, home again.

sandi arrived at 5.3o, as requested. our kids weren’t ready, we were about 5, no more than 10, minutes late. her comment? "i don’t know why people say come at a certain time if youre not ready."

mum handled this one like a champ. she just smiled and said, "and do you have children, sandi?" the answer to this being no.

we hailed two separate taxi’s and headed off to the boat club, the kids very excited. now you know i love frugal blake, don’t you? well, he left sandi in the back of the taxi with two kids and chose to sit in the front himself! who DOES that???

we arrived at the club, and…it was shut. for the next three days. for chinese new year.

the kids were puzzled. the club? closed? but..but…where were they going to eat their junk food? what about the cake that had perched precariously on mummy’s lap that they knew had chocolate frosting on it? carys hadn’t been able to sit on mummy’s lap because the cake was on it and she, according to sebastian, " did NOT want to get frosting all over her BOTTOM, right mummy? HER BOTTOM." carys’ lip began to tremble. the kids looked soberly at the CHOCOLATE CAKE which now, apparently, would never get eaten.

sandi and i tried to make reservations elsewhere that was child friendly, but it wasn’t looking good. dad said, "let’s go to mcdonalds." i said, "sandi has never been to mcdonalds" we double checked this piece of trivia with her and she agreed it was so and then said, "i would go wtih you, but i would never eat there."

we decided to head back home, dad again sitting solo in the front seat ("what do you mean it is inconsiderate, teresa? the person in front pays! she should have been thrilled!) and two kids sitting in the back of the taxi where he is, mum and me in the second taxi. jasper bursting into tears when the taxi i am in pulls away.

we get home, i order two pizza’s from pizza hut. blake does not like pizza. this does not matter, this is for the kids. then we order spinach salads for blake and tess, rueben sandwiches for mum and sandi, and sad decides he wants chili as well. and the kids are still antsy so we let them have birthday cake. we cut into the cake and never sing happy birthday to blake because he is checking his stocks online. i put on the aristocats, and the kids start watching.

(speaking of watching, i saw NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN the other day…if you have seen it, let’s talk).

so…that was frugal blake’s happy birthday party. our food was excellent, the adults sat around and talked and laughed and had a very, very nice time. it was a great evening. the kids loved the concept of eating dessert first and gallantly offered to have cake for their entire meal and pizza for breakfast. ‘

i did not take them up on that offer.

i cant write too much about the kids, makes my eyes react…but…HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAM, i love you and i am very proud of you. my next blog is about you.

xo

an update!

i am trying to write as quickly as possible from my hotel room in port huron michigan.

not because i am short of time, but because i fear that if my fingers do not move briskly, i might lose circulation in my digits and acquire frostbite. it is very cold in port huron. to be fair, toronto was just as cold.

let’s see…i left thursday, and the next morning i was up early, moving magazines from coffee tops, moving chairs from the dining room tables, lifting rented flatware and china to the dining room, and making  appetisers for the party. then anne (who shall get her own special blog post very soon) came to collect me and we went to get stockings, and to see if doug’s present had come in for him.

charles and i had made doug a hardcover coffee table album  filled with photos of him over the past 80 years. because of delays waiting for photos to come in, we hadn’t been able to order the book when we wanted to, and had to go with the most expensive option, having it overnight shipped for $70. as of the day of the party, the book hadn’t arrived…tick tock! anne and i were worried! as well, i learned the morning before i flew out that the party was formal…i don’t have a lot of winter formal outfits! (at left the cover of the book that we finally picked up at the 11th hour in markham.)

that afternoon i also had to make another appetiser and a salad for the party, so there wasn’t a lot of time to accomplish all that i needed to. but amen, we had the book, and the second priority was the food, which got done, and then i got very hungry so we had lunch at this funky little place on bayview called riz (owned by the same people who own lemongrass down the road), and some stockings. but still, what to wear? there wasn’t enough time to buy something, so i borrowed an amazing dress of anne’s… pictures to follow.

i got back to doug’s at 4.30… the party started at 6pm… and forget hair and makeup, there were more salads that needed to be made, things that needed chopping, lots that needed to be done. for the next hour or so i worked away, and at 15 to six i went upstairs to change and was actually able to give magnificent charles a smooch! yes, he was in town! looking so handsome!

doug was very gracious, greeting his guests and making sure we were getting them drinks, and he was clearly in his element as everyone was thrilled to celebrate with him. there were a lot of people i would have liked to have talked to more, but the kids were the caterers, circulating, removing plates, getting more drinks, clearing up rubbish, fetching, all night long. at one point we ran out of drink, and poor charles had to run out in a building snow storm to buy 8 more bottles of white and i think 2 more bottles of red. penny’s girls, thank goodness they’re responsible because they got ice cream (for the cake) and extra ginger ale and were also so helpful. (with about 40 – 50 people at the party, half were family and half sailing friends – the two groups of people near and dear to charles’ dad. here is an extended family picture representing both charles’ mom [who passed away in 2002] & dad sides of the family and three generations.)

the party ended at around 11.30pm, after a few speeches, a song, a poem, but it didn’t become a roast, like those events so often become.

and then the serious cleaning started. the jetlag was serious, but seriously, could you have gone upstairs to bed knowing that two people (doug was not cleaning up thankfully) were cleaning up from an entire party all by themselves??? sorry, not me. so after a few more pics i changed into jammies. penny had a post mortem with her dad and they chatted and carolyn, charles and i cleaned. folded card tables, chairs, put dishes back in boxes, removed napkins from rooms, cleared, removed bottles from downstairs to upstairs, covered the cake and put it in the freezer, took the chicken pot pies and put them in the freezers. (at left charles with his dad, and sisters carolyn [l] and penny [r].)

(have to say, it was like a late night dinner after the prom, everyone in their finery, tucking into hot, comforting chicken pot pie, green (or spinach) salad, the last few drops of champagne, and cake and ice cream.)

at around 2am the only thing left to do was the dishes, and those could wait until morning. i was so tired. i slept for 3 hrs when charles left for the airprt to fly back to hk.

doug had a great night.

what’s up in hong kong?

to keep tabs on what’s happening while tess is away, and see some belated pictures of the kids from Christmas, head on over to charles’ blog.

fly away home

tomorrow i am leaving for canada.

today has been a pretty frantic day, trying to take care of last minute details and show my mum and dad everything they need to know about running the house for the next few days.

i have no problems with leaving my kids. charles and i left sebastian alone for romantic weekend jaunts when he was just a poppet, and right after the triplets were released from the nicu i went to india with charles for five days of walking numbly through the streets of bangalore, a city i now detest for several reasons.

but this time, it is tough to leave the kids. they are not pulling guilt trips, there are no tears or beggings to take them. they’re fine, i’m not. i haven’t left the kids for so long, it’s not in my groove. i’m no longer the mum who leaves her kids for funky getaways. i’m much more staid.

this morning, right after carys had shuffled out of bed, i offered her sanctuary in my room. we cuddled for a while and whispered about silly things, and then i said to her, "kitten, did you know that tomorrow mummy will be taking the airplane?" and she smiled and said, "yes". i tried to explain to her that mummy would miss her very much, but my little flaxen haired darling just smiled and shushed me because she wanted to sing the theme song from bob the builder which was on the telly.

tonight as jasper was brushing his teeth, i went over to him and reminded him, "jasper, tomorrow mummy will go on the airplane, right honey?" and he said, "but i want you to brush my teeth NOW!"

oh these kids will not miss me much. but i am going to miss them A LOT! they are incredibly naughty and frustrating and hands on, but so very fascinating.

remind me and i will try to tell you about frugal blake’s aborted birthday party. oh the tears.

my parents are off seeing atonement, the kids are at western park and i am half arsed here in front of the computer, finishing a column that is due the 11th but obviously needs to be submitted before i head off to toronto on thursday.

i witnessed a sight i never thought i would see yesterday…during dinner sebastian placed a piece of geotrax train set infront of my dad and said, "granddad blake, this is your gun." holding a much more gun resembling article to him he continued, "this is my gun. after dinner, we will play baddies and goodies." no need to continue and tell you who was the baddie and who was the goodie.

here are the strange facts:

1) i let my father and my son race around my flat pretend shooting at each other

2) my father agreed and totally got into this! ducking into doors, hiding in closets and jumping out at all odd times! it was amazing.

hearing sebastian’s giggle as he tired to get out his "zing zing" sounds was delightful. we had a talk before the game and i asked him if he knew what it meant if you were shot dead. "no" he confessed. " it means that you are no longer alive." "are you in heaven then? so it is good to shoot someone dead?"

oy.

"it is wrong to shoot someone, because they may not want to be dead. it is against the law."

eventually we gave up the discussion and the hilarity commenced.

jasper and carys had doctors appointments today. oh the public system can be tedious. we arrived at the hospital at 10.30am and did not leave until 12.20pm. carys did really well on her appointment, but the doctor diagnosed jasper with something called harrison sulcus, which basically means that his asthma and breathing has affected the shape of his diaphragm. could this have been prevented if i were a better mother? apparently not, but who knows. long term effects? give me a few minutes with dr google and i will let you know.

cold snap

it is difficult to blog when you have guests. not because of the fight for computer time, because that really isn’t happening this trip – more like i am sharing all my observations and experiences (and thank goodness it’s about fricking time) the kids with someone on a daily, pretty much 24 hour basis and so it seems there is little to say.

but there is actually quite a lot.

it got down to seven degress celcius yesterday in hong kong, and in the new territories it got down to one degrees. that is just one degree away from the zero degree it once clocked in at back in 1983. can you imagine. and because of the lack of central heating, and lack of places to go and the huge windows, oh it is cold! cold cold cold cold cold!

doesn’t mean we haven’t been shopping. i nearly bought a cute pair of baby phat jeans today, but i didn’t like the back pocket. that may seem silly not to buy a pair of jeans because of the back pocket but you know what i mean, right? it was all detailed and logoed and goldish. i like a back pocket, and frankly, my jlo can speak for myself and i don’t need the words PHAT written on my tushie, which kind of sends off that signal all by it’self, thank you very much. so i didn’t get the jeans, which is a pity, because the colour of the denim was divine, just what i was looking for. but i did get a great shirt, which will go really well under sweaters.

kids are happy grandparents are here. the GRUFFALO is getting read again and again and again, as well as THE SELFISH CROCODILE and LITTLE TIGER GETS A SURPRISE. so did i…i got home from my cold power shop not only to smell beef stew happily slow cooking away, but to find frugal blake swinging from the light fixures. the jets won! he announced and gave me a huge hug! a hug! when we had left, at the beginning of the second half, he was getting so depressed he was flicking over to watch around the world in 80 days and then planes, trains and automobiles. so frugal was thrilled, which was fun.

i gave gary and marianne the day off on saturday, there was nothing really for them to do and they deserve it. we had a good day. the kids were well behaved and we had fun.

i am getting ready to go to toronto for doug’s 80h birthday. it is shaping up to be quite the party and i am really quite excited.

so apologies for the silence and thank you for the loving hotmail, email and msn’s asking if i am alive, healthy and,,,,if so, why the heck aren’t i writing?

in more ways than one, baby got back.

(but i didn’t get phat).

the drive for independence

our society exists on the assumption that you own a car.

everything – from baby products to groceries are created with the assumption that the farthest you have to carry the product is from car door to front door. people who drive are your only consideration.

what about us? i want to scream sometimes. except no one cares.

life can be extremely challenging for those without cars.

when i just started college and moved to a big city, i learned what not having a driver’s license meant. what a loss of independence it is. i gave up great student digs for medicore ones, having to base my choices on where the transport was located. i choose courses around bus times, because in those days, mount royal had one bus that came every 35 minutes. it was called the circle route.

getting groceries? very difficult. you can either spend a fortune at the mom and pop shops and pick up your necessities there, or do a massive shop once every month or so, and try not to drink any milk. doing laundry? oh yes, how to get to a laundromat with two bulging bags of laundry, plus soap and softener? the list goes on, really it does.

i can’t carry objects for a long time any more. gone are the days when i could haul bags of books, or groceries up a hill. from a bus stop to my student housing.

but i can promise that i am going to do what i can to make sure that my kids have the independence of a car. transport – being able to go to a party when you want or leave it when you want, to go see someone who is on the other side of town – that freedom – is an amazing gift that i believe many people take for granted. stop at a bookstore and browse if you’re early. being able to get into a vehicle and move, wherever they want. stop where they choose. amazing.

my kids will have cars.

im not saying i will pay for them entirely myself, but i am saying i think it is very important.

before i blog today, may i go on the record first and say that i have been having dizzy spells all today. this isn’t epilepsy related, just possibly noteworthy. so, noted.

it might have something to do with the fricking cold. can you believe that it is going to go down to 10 above tomorrow? this is in a town that doesn’t have central heating. sela and jasper’s class trip to the farm tomorrow will be cancelled unless the weather drastically improves.

i am living the life of a single mother. oh wait, except i am still married.

but yesterday i made pork chops in the slow cooker and we started the week off right by JASPER finishing his meal first. granted, he still needed me to pile the food on this fork, but he still was the first to finish. this is HUGE in his life. kept me going in the wake of the fact i was the one having to do all the reminding and whinging and tough parenting arsing aspect of things.

today, a good day but a sad one – does that make sense? denby left town. i am sad for my kids, i am sad for me.

i didn’t spend much time with denby, but we were friends. her husband gave me very good advice, and encouraged me. and she had stuck with me through some very scary times in my life and i had prayed myself into a coma during some very difficult times in hers. and i had watched her children thrive. she mine. and now she is leaving. she has had her heart’s desire granted. she is going back to adelaide. i will miss her. we did share some amazing times. i will see her again.

hong kong is a transient city, those are the facts, and that brings sadness. that is the emotion.

chicken adobo fantastico

here you are – chicken adobo for the slow cooker.

lita approved and that says something.

CHICKEN ADOBO for the slow cooker

1-1/2 small sweet onion, sliced

1 cup and two Tablespoons of soy sauce (i prefer light for this recipe)

1 teaspoon black peppercorns

8 cloves garlic, crushed (the vampire fearing types among you may prefer more)

3/4 cup vinegar (I prefer white, many people like red wine)

1-1/2 (3lb) whole chicken cut into pieces (or you can use chicken wings/thighs, breasts..whatever you’ve got).

1 cup water

2 bay leaves

1. Place chicken in a slow cooker.
2. In a small bowl mix the onion, garlic, soy sauce, and vinegar, and pour over the chicken.
3. Cook on Low for 6 to 7 hours.
4. Eat over white rice

i am gearing up for another stint as a single parent – magnificent leaves saturday evening for a long business trip. i see him for one night on 7 february and then not until just past valentines day.

some gal pals and i had a fun night tuesday – we went to the movies. all the girls attending live in our building and one of them hosted a pre-cinema drinks party in the form of lai chi margaritas. very delicious. she even made me a virgin one….now that’s a thoughtful neighbour!

27 dresses was an okay movie, but just getting out was even better.

jasper is busy telling everyone that he is a big boy now that he eats vegetables. and for the record, he did eat vegetables again tonight, carrots and broccoli. but seriously, how much do these kids like rice? it is amazing. sebastian doesn’t like pasta anymore (except kraft dinner, which can be used in lieu of a canadian passport if he ever loses his), he just wants rice. they don’t want anything on it, they just like plain rice.

when i put the broccoli on the fork, jasper insists on piling the rice on top of it. this is painstaking and let’s face it, we’re talking about rice here….this is sticky. so jasper has started carrying around a hankerchief so he can wipe his mouth and fingers when they get too sticky because of the rice.

if he asks for a finger bowl, he is out of here.