i thought i was off crack

as you all are aware, young sebastian went to kindy when he was the tender age of 2.5. i popped him on the bus and he sat down, was bucked in and driven away, with adam at his side. we took photos and video that day, and i shed a few tears before racing upstairs to shove bottles into the three vomit-prone mouths that waited there.

today the triplets and their friend tallinn went to their first ever (besides the creche at church) parent or helper unsupervised event: teacher and toddler at the ppa. six kids, one teacher, two hours of playschool in a familiar, fun environment. hooray! i have been so excited thinking about this, wondering if they would cry, wondering how i would deal with it if they did cry, that i forgot to wonder if i would feel sentimental.

my mum asked me on the phone today how i felt about it, in a gentle voice. i squealed back, "ecstatic! can’t wait. i just wish they were all doing something at the same time." it would be ideal if the triplets could get into kindergarten with sebastian, but that is unlikely to happen, so these afternoon classes are the next best thing…and did i mention that a parent doesn’t have to be with them?

in introducing the kids to the concept of "school" i told them they could each wear a backpack, like the big kids do. they loved this idea. "but mummies don’t go to school" i explained. "just big kids".

once at the ppa, tallinn, sela, jasper, and carys hung up their backpacks and took off their shoes (which would soon go on again) and then raced over to the table and began playing with the playdough that was spread out there. after taking them for wees, tara and i looked at each other and realised it was time to go. we explained we were going, and the kids said, "see you later, mummy" and we walked out. they did not watch us leave.

having each other there made it easier for the four of them. and they are used to the ppa and love it there. so yay. but still, not even one of them could squeeze out a tear? a sob, even? whatever.

as we left, i realised i felt not sad, but odd. it felt odd to leave them. they were so grown up.

i love this independence they’re displaying, but this is a big step away from me. which is what i wanted. but, wow.

crack goes my heart, as i realise they are ready to explore alone, and are excited to do so. i am proud, excited, and sad.

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5 Replies to “i thought i was off crack”

  1. yea! to sela, carys, and jasper!!!
    *HugS* to mom. and grats to you for being able to let them go. it’s hard, sometimes, to not think of them as tiny, fragile babies, but i guess they haven’t been that for a long time.
    oh, and happy belated b-day to Mozilla! (i’ll always remember your birthday, just a few days late :).

    Reply

  2. this aunties heart is cracking with you…..
    loved the video of kids singing happy B-day to MO….
    LOve to all

    Reply

  3. Hi Sweetie,
    Catching up on posts. So you’ll have multiple comments in this one!
    “i thought i was off crack”: Miss A waves me off when she goes to school and it stings. I’m glad she is confident but jeesh, sometimes I wish I’d get that extra hug or a “I’ll miss you mommy” instead of “see ya!”
    “Lifts”: Good Sebbie. : ) and Good Tess for making him the badge.
    “Carys and knickers”: Woo hoo my sweet Carys for dry knickers! Sela, sorry babe, that’s one area we can’t be like the boys. (But that’s pretty funny that she tried).

    Reply

  4. Well, all growing up and Mom’s the one crying? Next step is off to college (yes, it seems to fly up before you know it).

    Reply

  5. where does the time go? feels like yesterday we were reading about them in the NICU. and now they go off to kindy on their own. sigh.
    xx

    Reply

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ABOUT AUTHOR
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a 34 year old mother of four.

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i thought i was off crack

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Reader interactions

5 Replies to “i thought i was off crack”

  1. yea! to sela, carys, and jasper!!!
    *HugS* to mom. and grats to you for being able to let them go. it’s hard, sometimes, to not think of them as tiny, fragile babies, but i guess they haven’t been that for a long time.
    oh, and happy belated b-day to Mozilla! (i’ll always remember your birthday, just a few days late :).

    Reply

  2. this aunties heart is cracking with you…..
    loved the video of kids singing happy B-day to MO….
    LOve to all

    Reply

  3. Hi Sweetie,
    Catching up on posts. So you’ll have multiple comments in this one!
    “i thought i was off crack”: Miss A waves me off when she goes to school and it stings. I’m glad she is confident but jeesh, sometimes I wish I’d get that extra hug or a “I’ll miss you mommy” instead of “see ya!”
    “Lifts”: Good Sebbie. : ) and Good Tess for making him the badge.
    “Carys and knickers”: Woo hoo my sweet Carys for dry knickers! Sela, sorry babe, that’s one area we can’t be like the boys. (But that’s pretty funny that she tried).

    Reply

  4. Well, all growing up and Mom’s the one crying? Next step is off to college (yes, it seems to fly up before you know it).

    Reply

  5. where does the time go? feels like yesterday we were reading about them in the NICU. and now they go off to kindy on their own. sigh.
    xx

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

ABOUT AUTHOR
WANTED FOR BLOGGING

a 34 year old mother of four.

RECENT POSTS
BREAD AND THE BAD BIT

Are sandwich letters a bad thing? You know sandwich letters, you’ve received one before, everyone has. They’re an impersonal form of rejection. Think back to

More precious than silver

Love comes in many forms. It isn’t my dad’s birthday, and it certainly isn’t Father’s Day, but today I want to dedicate my blog to

ohhh…THAT blue dress girl

monica lewinsky was on the cover of a magazine the other day. she is a person i have a great deal of sympathy for. bill

Water: essential or a loved luxury?

when i first moved to hong kong in may 1997, charles and i were had student loans and virtually no capital. his contract was ending

Face it, its a facelift

This weeks’ cover of people magazine sees hollywood babes denigrate plastic surgery. they all do. yet no one is getting older in that celluloid, cellulite