despite our best intentions, there are some things magnificent and i just dont get around to doing.
a great example of this would be booking flights and programmes for the kids. over one month ago i found a great summer programme for the triplets, located two blocks away from charles’ dad’s place. i also found flights for us. a great discounted price.
that was february 29.
four weeks, plus, later, those flights and classes have not been booked.
why?
magnificent is right here beside me. let’s ask him why.
"charles, why haven’t we booked those flights?"
"time." he responded. to which i replied, "what do you mean, time?"
"lack of time." at this point i am sure we both remembered watching seven episodes of lost and other time consuming things we enjoyed (or spending time with the children, which depending onthe day might not have been enjoyable) throughout march.
"no really, why haven’t we booked the flights?"
"why do you think we haven’t booked them?" he’s almost asleep, i better make this quick.
"traditionally, you do it.": this is a fact, but is it also an excuse? could i just flash charles a look one day after he came home and say, "i’ve booked the summer flights?" as he’s not going, would that look a bit rude? or aggressive?
he’s not answering me any more…i think he is asleep or bored of the conversation. but we tend to have mental block in our relationship like this. our conversations only take us up to certain points. and then nothing gets down and despite all the preplanning, we end up in a tizzy, which of course is not good for the anal retentive soul.
does this happen in any other household and does any one know WHY?
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9 Replies to “can the scandanavians finnish?”
Probably because we are waiting for the other to do it. So go ahead, instead of reading more comments, book it. Right now. What are you waiting for?
thank you joseph.
yes.
for us it’s because we are both introverts. booking flights, talking to preschools, whatever, involves talking to people (although thankfully less necessary than in the past), and talking to people is more painful than, say, self-inflicted brain surgery.
another reason is that we don’t want to do something that they other will then say, “oh, but i didn’t want *that* one.” fear of failure. fear of picking the wrong color or time or whatever. fear of spending so much money.
good luck.
Mo knows that booking flights is not my forte so she interrogates me to find out when I have some free time then she books the flights.I have paniced a few times when I thought she may have forgot to book flights but Mo has always delivered.
My suggestion is to ask Mo to grill Charles to the point he will simply say oK Mo, you book them.One caution is once she has booked them don’t try to change them without her knowledge and consent. Remember 2001 and the series of lumps I had on my skull?
Love to all…..Dad
Not rude or aggressive, just proactive! You and the little ones are going, he’s not, so it makes sense you book flights at times that are most convenient for you. Maybe give him a little heads up in the morning, “hey Charles I’m booking flights today, do you have any preferences?” If not, well, he snoozes, he loses.
I think it’s just the typical, “I thought you were doing it” thing that tends to happen with couples, especially ones that are busy with multiple small children.
Iv found that the man child and i have got ourselves in a bit of a rut, well to be honest its a big giant pot hole…but we have realised its a problem and are working on it.
I think it started when we got together becouse for the first time in my life i didnt have to take control of everything, i could lean up on his big strong chest and he would battle the world for me. Then he lost his company and he got depressed and while he was losing it i took control becouse thats what needed to be done and thats what i do…only now i cant stop. And when i ask him to do something or a assume its something he should be doing he either takes so long to do it or he forgets becouse he thinks he so busy!! Very very frustrating!!!!
I agree though maybe you should be booking it cos he’s not going and it should be to your convenience?
Miza
I booked the flights.
I booked the flights
Charles – booked the flights twice? Good work!