four questions

I went on a great walk today, not a run, mind you, but a walk, (respectful of most recent injury), but just to mix it up a little, I did 20 push ups as well.

So that's me out of the way.

Peeps are asking whazzup with the kids. Here are four random questions:

1) What is up with Sebastian and his "issues"

Earlier this year we had him on Ritalin for two weeks. I have no problem medicating, but unfortunately, this was not a good mix. He wasn't sleeping or eating…I would get up at 5.30 and he would be awake. You can't concentrate if you're tired. After a couple of meetings with his teachers, we took him off.

Since then, he is still behind in maths and takes a painfully slow time to write things down. His grasp of English is pretty good, but he just takes a while to commit it to paper. His memorization of basic maths is not. I have been trying to supplement his maths at home. This was really taking a toll on our relationship until Seb's teacher found an online maths program for us. I am still mean mummy who makes Seb do extra homework, (basically reinforcing what they are learning at school and trying to get those multiplication tables, subtraction/addition basics and that dratted division nailed down), but at least I am no longer the one asking the confounded questions. I am the person beside him, cheering him on. In the past three weeks I have really been diligent, and I have seen improvements. His timestables are sinking in. Subtraction is his biggest challenge.

2) Is Jasper hugely popular?

Not really. In his mind he is a bit of a legend, but no, he's not hugely popular. He isn't incredibly talented at sport, he doesn't have any one good friend, nor does he make the effort to. He is making one friend right now, but that seems to be about it. He's a floater. He gets invited to a lot of birthday parties, but he doesn't have one BFF.

3) Anything new with Carys?

Actually yes. She's developed a couple of phobias. The other day she came to me and burst into tears. When prompted, she confessed that she was afraid she was going to be sent "to the pwincipals office and he would be cwoss." I whipped a quick email off to her teacher, who does not send children to the principal's office, and she had a quick word in the corridor with Carys, which included Carys crying again, and then after being reassured that she makes sensible choices and isn't going down to see the principal, going to the toilet to wash her face.

Now, Carys' latest thing is not wanting to visit friend's houses. Why? The parent might shout, the cat might scratch. Whazzup?

4) Did Sela finally lose her tooth?

She's lost two, thank you very much. She's having a good final term. She has a playdate with a friend on Thurs and is very, very excited. So am I…she's waited a long time for this. When the playdate was finalised, she requested that she call the mum and say how happy she was. Why not? Her vocabulary is growing and she is a very verbal young person. She still wants to be an artist when she grows up. 

My parents left on Saturday. It was the best visit ever, except for the bloody pollution. But wow, we had a great time. I am going to ask my mum to write a guest blog, but you get to choose the topic. Is it?

a) what life is really like in my home

b) what hong kong is really like

c) do i really treat my kids like i think i treat my kids?

d) your choice

if we ask nicely and pay him some money (or peanuts…literally), my dad might do a guest blog as well.

Forty and for me.

In my last post I turned 40.

The actual turning was a riot, but rather anticlimactic in a
way.

Books and conversations are peppered with the comments,
“Since turning 40 she had noticed….” “It was at 40 that she decided…” “One
morning she woke up and she was 40”.

For me, turning 40 only meant that I could have cake for
breakfast three days in a row.

So I did.

Other than that little bonus, I was ready for 40.

And my fantastic husband threw me a wonderful party,
attended by some amazing friends. Everyone (except for one….ANGELA!) dressed up
in 70’s, 80’s and 90’s costume. Charles upped the ante by arriving as THE MASK.
I was Wonder Woman. My sister and boyfriend were the Flintstones. And the music
was all 80’s baby.

 Turning 40 was the best.

 And it has only gotten better.

One of the biggest reasons for this is my recent trip to the
Philippines. As my birthday passed and one set of visitors (Pam, her boyfriend
and my sweet niece Alex) gave way to another (my parents), my sense of
excitement over our upcoming trip to the Philippines grew.

We were going to help lead an ICM Kids Camp. All of us.

I do not want to overemphasize my role. I was a counsellor,
a team leader. But to be part of something so important to kids had a huge
impact on me. To be able to share it with my parents, to know they were willing
to spend part of their holiday making a difference in the lives of others, made
me EXTRAORDINARILY proud.

 We packed, taking every outgrown shirt and pair of shoes
with us. Bought several new pairs of crocs for kids we would never meet.

And set off, all eight of us.

The kids are pretty good fliers, and we arrived to Manila no
problem.

Getting to Dumaguete was no problem either. We were there.
And it was beautiful. The resort was fine, and we had a purpose.

We met the rest of the team members. Practised our theme
song of the week. Were assigned teams. Heard about the daily routine.

That first day, we toured a local orphanage and school very
similar to the kindergarten we sponsor in the next province, outside of
Bacolod. The orphanage was wonderful, the kids are so healthy and happy. The
fact that so many are siblings did my heart good. Their parents may be gone,
but the children can still stay together.

The second day, we piled into the vans and headed off the
kids camp, with the intention of setting up once we got there. That plan very
quickly went awry, because upon arrival, we saw the kids were over an hour
early. One hundred kids, sitting on the grass, waiting for us quietly.

Love and tears started in me, and for the next four days
never really went away.

The kids camp was overwhelming at times. The kids were so
well behaved. The formula was quite simple, but the kids were so thrilled.
Watching their faces during snack and lunch time. How carefully they painted,
coloured and enjoyed the various crafting activities, their joy at playing “the
parachute” with the other kids, the beanbag running games, the satisfaction on
their faces when we ran a good race.

How the second day when they recognised me they ran to me.

How by the third day some of them were volunteering to be in
skits.

How none of them wanted camp to end.

How Sela became friends with one little girl, and another
little girl, Dhelia, befriended Carys. Watching them sharing events without any
common language.

How hot it was at times.

How I wondered so many times how these children could be so
happy, despite the hardships they face on a daily basis.

How my kids claimed it was an amazing vacation, despite the
work, heat and the waits that come with being with a group of people.

They’re right. It was an amazing time. One of the best
vacations in my life.

I am still a deeply flawed person. A regular human. But I’m
still changing. This didn’t happen when I turned 40…this happened when my kids
got old enough that we could participate in outreach activities.

But 40 is good too…the cake was, and the
phone calls and emails were too. The people were. Thank you everyone for being part of my life. It's just getting happier and better.

Now we are 40

Today I turned 40.

I woke up, grabbed my iphone to check my sleep patterns from last night, said hello to my husband, and hopped up to do a wee. When i got back to bed, I read a bit, (nothing like a lie in on a special day!) and then my phone rang. My first serenade of the day! Thank you Damian and Ursula!

Followed by the kids, Pam and Edd.

And then my parents.

And then my little sister Mandy.

My father in law Doug had called the night before.

I had a nice cup of tea, and barked commands at the kids, who were giggly and happy and squirmy. Sela asked how old I was. Not wanting to divulge too much information I asked her How Old She Thought I was. She looked at me carefully and said, "How old were you yesterday?" SHe has a wobbly tooth right now and reckons she is la knees de la bees.

Ed went on a field trip with Jasper's class, hooray! I took him down to Kennedy School and introduced him around to everyone. I was wearing my running gear. After I left Ed safe in the clutches of 1T, I had two choices. I could either go for a run, OR I could go to Bootcamp.

I know as well as the next person that Bootcamp is the better all over workout, but you know what? It was my birthday and I wanted to run. I was 40! Didn't I need to be thoughtful and ruminate? Apparently not. There was no great aha moment, and I gave myself about 12 kilometres to have it. It was a good morning for a run, I don't think I broke much of a sweat. I ran up two pretty steep hills and kept a great pace. But…nothing AMAZING. Just a good solid run. So glad I went for a run instead of to Bootcamp.

Came back home and got ready to go out for lunch with Ursula, Janne and Pam (and Alex). Having Alex here, I realised that my children were never six months old. I never ate with one hand, moved things automatically out of reach, multitaskted like that??? No way. I can't believe how smart my sister is.
Unfrounately Pam isn't feeling well, and, has sideeffects that are paramount in the LYons family – SHE CANT TASTE HER FOOD. This is big. So the poor girl can't hear, is out to lunch, unable to chat with my friends, unable to enjoy the (sorry, DELICIOUS) food, and generally feels wretched. Not a fun time for her, but I still had fun!

We grabbed a few things very quickly in the lanes and headed to school for the pickup. When Seb saw ALex he was overjoyed. He LOVES that girl. The trips were at lego and laptops.

WHen the trips came home Pam supervised the decorating of my cake. At one point she came into my room, looking a bit harassed. "Do you want a Princess cake or an Indiana Jones cake?" she asked. I looked at her, nonplussed. Then i realised there was a tie, and I was expected to break it. Instead I answered, "Divide the cake into four sections, and give each a quarter to decorate".

WHen Charles got home, we went out for dinner to Dan Ryans. It was a great meal. Love their reliable, fun food.

Came home, and there was CAKE, CARDS and presents! I got the BEST MUG IN THE WORLD. I love it. Seb told me very proudly it is recylclable. Hooray! It has the kids pictures all over it, and a few of charles and I as well. Gorgeousness!!! But, oh my, the piece de resistance, was…I GOT A GARMIN WATCH! This is the equivalent of a tiffany ring for runners, apparently. IT IS GORGEOUS, and does everything  but tap dance. I am SO EXCITED, but i am a bit puzzled. It seems a bit counterproductive. I am going to spend so much time reading the GARMIN instruction booklet I won't have any time to run!

IT IS THE NIFTIEST WATCH. I have no idea what it does, but I know it is great. YAY YAY YAY.

Hello 40!

Friday is the party. Saturday there are likely to be pictures. So get ready to laugh and if you have any musts for 80's parties, please let me know ASAP.

Now we are six

When I was one
I had just begun
When I was two
I was nearly new
When I was three
I was hardly me
When I was four
I was not much more
When I was five
I was just alive

But now I am six,

I'm as clever as clever;

so I think I'll be six now
for ever and ever

– A.A. Milne

And it has been forever since I blogged.

But it has been good times. It seems impossible, but I know it happened, that just a few terrible, wonderous years ago, my life was about scheduling feedings. Now it is about scheduling playdates.

Oh the gorgeous little kittens.

We are still loud, but even there we are either making progress OR I really am turning deaf.
I will be optimistic though.

Since I last blogged, I have gotten my hair done. Completely removed the blonde streaks in my hair. It is back to brown. I have a new hairdresser, and I think if I go back to streak loving Edmund Scissorhands, he will be a bit devastated. It is odd to be back to chocolate brown again, with no cheeky bits highlighting my face, but honestly, since I can't have highlights thanks to the hairloss caused by stress (think evacuation times two of this summer), I have just been wandering around looking increasingly like a skunk, not a good look muriel. So I got the colour removed, or rinsed out, or something organic, and I am brown, nut brown again.

Sebastian seems to have turned a small but definite corner with his handwriting. It is improving…ish?

Jasper has four party invites for the next two weeks. He's loving it.

Carys has two, and she is quite pleased. She "finally" had the long awaited playdate with her friend Charleigh the other day, and it was great fun for kids and adults alike.

Sela is impressing me no end with her Mandarin. She really has a grasp of languages. For the obvious reasons, I want her to be a plastic surgeon — would it benefit her career (and of course my long term facial care) if she was a surgeon who spoke mandarin and english?

CHarles is working all the hours that God sends.

AND MY SISTER PAM, HER BOYFRIEND AND MY NIECE ARRIVE IN TWO HOURS!

Adios five!

Tomorrow they are six. An interesting age, to say the least. There is such confidence, but growing awareness adds to uncertainties. There are such strong family ties, but attitudes cause little pecking orders within the family. Two days ago, Carys announced, "I have two brothers and I love one of them. His name is Sebastian." Carys has absolutely no time for Jasper. "Jasper isn't being caring!" she will announce to all and sundry. "Jasper isn't being sensitive!" (Caring, sensitive, risk taker, honest etc are all characteristics of a PYP/IB student, and the kids are becoming familiar with the words, obviously!)

Sebastian and Sela used to be thisclose but now, not so much. Seb and Carys are close. This upsets Sela, who will share with her big brother or right out give him something of hers, anything to be in the sunshine of his approval. But until she stops whinging, she won't be Sebastian's best girl.

Sela is quick to denounce Carys though. "Carys doesn't sing this song as well as I do" she announces about the Gong Shi (?) song that she taught her sister.

And Jasper, well, he is pretty much everyone's stepping board and cuddly toy. He is so laid back you want to shake and squeeze him all at once. Oh he's quick to tears, but so quick to say, "that's okay" the minute he gets his own way. And he has absolutely no accountability. The other day he was late getting out the door and roared, "SEBBIE! You should have given me my backpack!"

My mother said something to me the other day that just made me want to squeeze her….she announced, "Tessie (no, that wasn't the offensive bit), one day you are going to realise just how noisy your kids are. I think you're immune."

Does she really?

Maybe I should scream this…. DOES SHE REALLY?

Or do I just have to pick my battles?

I am not immune as to how incredibly loud my children are. Nor do I mind her one bit saying that they are loud, because I know she loves them like crazy. BUT to think that I DON"T KNOW HOW LOUD THEY ARE? SERIOUSLY?

believe ME I KNOW THEY ARE LOUD.

I keep hoping it will be like manners…gradually they will quieten down, just like gradually they started saying thank you. And I do instruct them to be quiet. Frequently. Re-direct, removal, and words.

But when the majority of time you are playing with someone, the house is going to be at playdate level.

Oh, I know they are loud.

I think our neighbours do too.

We're trying.

it’s cold, i’ve got a cold but we’re out of the house

with so many new toys in the flat, the kids are getting kind of reckless with toys and are quite guilty of leaving dolls, speed stacks, or whiteboards lying in a heap as they were distracted away from their activity by a sibling waving an alternative game or activity.

needless to say, the thinking toy box is fuller than it is has been in a long time.

and the kids are quite sore about this, as mean mummy is usually quite selective when choosing toys to put in the thinking box, and takes the ones the kids will feel the absence of most for example, BEBE, special blanket, baby batman, speedstax, all things strawberry shortcake, starwars, and nerf gun are choices that will immediately result in if not contrite, then a child promising change and can they pleasepleaseplease have the toy back again.

it is also cold in hong kong. i mean really cold.

yesterday i was determined not to let the cold get to me.

it was chinese new years for goodness sake! i called up our friend kersti (the first person i met in hong kong besides MC) and confirmed that YES, despite my croaky voice and sela's white face, we would be coming to visit that afternoon!

kersti has four children. kersti lives in mui wo, which means we needed to take a ferry.

we resolved to take the 12pm ferry. DRESS WARMLY kersti texted me.

i got caught up chatting with meg, who came over to drop off a dollhouse to the girls. the girls were reluctant to leave the flat they love their new wooden dollhouse so much.

suddenly charles said, "im going to have a shower!" and i said, "i don't think you have time" and he said, "well, what ferry are we catching?" and i responded, "noon!"

meg looked at her watch and lifted her eyebrows.

"it's 11.30" said my love.

"great!" i said. i had already laid out the kids jackets and jumpers.

meg and her girls left quickly and the kids did final wees and we got ready to leave.

we got in a taxi at 11.46.

i KNEW we were going to make the ferry. i just KNEW it.

and we did. we had to run for it, and the ferry dropped us off at the wrong terminal (Cheung chau), but we made it! yay us!

kersti's sister melanie met us at the ferry terminal, and we walked to kersti's house. there are only limited areas that you can drive your car on mui wo. we didn't mind.

kersti's house is gorgeous. so modern and done up, just fantastic for her family of four. the kids all share a room that has double bunk beds. the kids range in age from 16 months to nine. they are a laughing, loving, incredibly well behaved household. it was a pleasure to be there. and i ate lentil soup that was just balm to my throat.

sela was having a tough time. she fell asleep on the ferry over and was not her usual interactive self.

it worries me when she sulks. is this who she is? i know i can be a right cow at times.
is this my contribution to who she is?

after a fantastic dinner and after about half the dinner plates/bowls, etc were washed up, we decided we better head down to the terminal to catch the 7.20 ferry. the wind was whipping around us pretty wildly and the light rain was cold.

we made it with about three minutes to spare…but…there was no activity.

yes my friends, because of the fireworks, there would be NO FERRIES UNTIL 8.40pm.

ah yes.

a quick trip to mcdonalds for icecream to boost the kids flagging spirits.

kersti, husband albert and three of their kids joined us. (kelvin stayed behind with kersti's sister melanie).

left mcdonalds at 8pm. watched the fireworks for a bit and then had to keep walking because it was so cold. jasper was determined to help and insisted on pushing the baby's pram. sela started crying because she was worried we were going to miss the ferry. we turned and headed for the terminal, jasper's hands getting colder all the time as he insisted on continuing to push the pram.

we reached the ferry, thanked kersti and albert and the kids again, promised a repeat visit for pokfulam, and then boarded the ferry. sela immediately fell asleep.

our journey wasn't smooth, and when we arrived in hong kong for some reason i never really understood we sat infront of the docking bay for 30 minutes. how frustrating was that. carys started crying. it was 9.40pm.

finally, we got off the ferry. and then the fight was on for a taxi. we got in a queue, but after four minutes, we realised it wasn't moving. a quick word with charles and we realised we might be smarter heading over to IFC to try and catch a taxi. we took a team caldwell vote and the kids decided that we should head over to IFC as well.

as we were headed to the overpass that would take us to IFC, i saw an ambulance/police car move away. the spot they were occupying said. TAXI DROP OFF AND PICK UP ONLY. charles had continued walking and i called him back and said, "let's try this!"

and then one taxi came by, and sped by us.

and then another came, and slowed down.

about 30 people ran for it, but we were in the designated place, and it stopped for us. people suddenly realised the ambulance was gone and a queue instantly formed. oh we were pleased as we drove by the queue we were formerly in and saw that it hasn't moved. we had definitely made the right decision!

i congratulated team caldwell on their decision making and thanked them for trusting me when i wanted to stay at the place i reckoned the taxi might stop.

sleepily, sela said, "and i know just the reward, mummy"

"what's that, lovey" i said to her

"you can take all the toys out of the thinking box"

well, i didn't take them all, but i did take couple key players.

sometimes when you haven't blogged in a v. long time, it's v tough to get started again. facing up to failure isn't fun.

but then again, i can catch you up on the good things that have happened.

on friday, we held the triplet's sixth birthday party. for those of you who keep track of those things (perhaps your child's birthday is also on the 23rd so it is easy for you to remember) yes, we were a couple of weeks earlier. but timing, that elusive group known as "they" claim is everything.

and, when i learned that PRINCESS AND THE FROG was being released on thursday 11 february, i determined that the triplets birthday would be the next day. and we would taken them and their guests to the cinema.

the ticket count turned out to be 60. seriously.

i sent out emails, followed up with phone calls, took drink and popcorn orders, made last minute phone calls. apologised when i realised i had already called.

friday, when the bell rang, the kids came streaming down. there were the agonising moments when a child would call out, "IS SO AND SO coming to the party?" and i woud ahve to say through clenched teeth and a smile, "no!" i made sure that all the kids were out of the school yard and then i headed down to cyberport where the movie was showing.

charles and pandemonium reigned. he handed me tickets, our friend dale a printout of the cinema and the seat places we had booked. (don't forget in HK you can book individual seats!) and then we just brought in the food.

there were a few isolated incidents, but overall it went well, and then afterwards we went up to the grassy area by cyberport, cut cake and sang happy birthday not one but three times. it was magic. then the kids raced around and that was fun too. we stayed until around 7pm, till the kids had had a good runaround, and then we headed home.

it was a great party. easier than most, and the cake was brilliant. you know charles gets the credit for that.

three days before the party, i had a bit of a sore throat. and a headache.

two days before the party, i said to sebastian's teacher, "i am only here today because i really really like you". she looked at me and although she is too nice to do a double take, said, "do you want to go home?"

that night at book club i pretty much said, "okay, we're done talking, i've ordered the bill, can we go now?" i didn't even finish my thai beef salad, but that was mainly because it was crappy. i should have ordered the chicken fajitas.

i bundled everyone into different taxis although two people were still in the middle of a conversation and alost fell asleep on the way home.

thursday, the fever was middling and the throat was croaky.

friday, the voice was pubescent and hoarse

it lasted for the party, but by 7pm it was pretty much gone

saturday, the voice was gone

today, i whispered and hissed by way through sunday school.

the kids are overjoyed. they can't hear me! a fantastic and legitimate reason to continue on their renegade ways!

we are loving chinese new year and the fact that tomorrow magnificent has the day off. we think we are going to mui wo for hiking and lunch if the weather holds. should be fun.

we've had a lot of that lately!

we were the children

today i was watching the news and i caught a news clip about the new USA FOR HAITI. they gave a brief broadcast of the song, i guess the whole thing will be revealed at the Vancouver Olympics but i reckon Shenzhen ought to have a copy before that.

hearing the tune made me sentimental. and i watched the new singers and i wondered, 'how on earth do they think that miley cyrus, l'il wayne and the like can do this song justice"? i quickly went to youtube to hear the original…to listen to michael jackson's haunting little voice inform us, "we are the world, we are the children…" to al jarreau, stevie wonder, bette midler, diana ross. a great song, great unlikely harmonies (Dionne and WIllie Nelson?)

i am a bit shortsighted and snobby to presume that the new crowd 'cant touch this'…this being the original. in fact, my own father had quite the disregard for 80's singers, and insisted they didn't have a thing on frankie, elvis, dino, the beatles and sighed in patient contempt if and when these big haired boys tried to take on a big band hit. (i think he always thought billy joel had an okay voice but possibly the respect was only there because at the time billy joel had Christie Brinkley and dad always though Christie Brinkley, after mum of course, was one of the cutest girls he knew.)

oh 1980's, you were wonderful.

it's amazing to see how many hits the USA for Africa video has gotten in the past four days on you tube. the 80's lovers want to reassure themselves that they weren't dreaming, that the overplayed original was pretty good. People born in the late seventies want to jog their memories of what their older siblings or parents were endlessly playing.

USA for africa. heck, i had the entire album. it was pretty good.

it was also a quarter of a century ago.

and now we're hearing it all over again. same words, different voices, probably a different target audience, but hopefully the reaction, and the giving, will be just as powerful and overwhelming as it was in 1985.

ciao bella

claudine left hong kong. over Christmas she moved with her husband and kids to Brisbane.

I never really saw much of Claudine after she met her mr right. they moved (and bought a place!) but she always had very cool, very easily memorisable phone numbers and she was always a link to the past. when you're in a transient place, it is tough to let go of those people who have been with you for years. (left: Claudine and I at Igor's circa 2000)

and i have known her for years, since 1997.

the next year, i met sandi at a wine dinner. she was terrorising the poor pr girl who knew nothing about wines compared to sandi, who has written books and endless articles on the topic.

sandi. who loves wines, movies, cards, good food, laughing, television, clever literature, morgan freeman (but maybe not any more), new york, soft top cars, walking, diet coke, interesting people, her husband Cliff (who also falls into the previous category) and life…but not necessarily in that order. (left: Sandi, back row 2nd from left and Claudine to the right. yes, that's charles on the extreme right front row and his sister penny front row left, at Igor's circa 2000)

sandi is also fond of blunt talking. when i informed her that i was pregnant with sebastian i was sitting at her kitchen table. the week before i had run into Cliff at the top of the peak and he had seen me and said, "you're disappearing!" and i said, "there's more here than you think!" so i reckoned he might have told her.

but apparently not. she put down her diet coke, looked at me, and said, very seriously, "is this something we;re happy about?" and when i smiled and said, "oh yes", she said, "then congratulations! it's wonderful news!" she was the first person who came to visit sebastian when he was born.

back to the straight talking. when i let her know that i was pregnant with triplets, again the diet coke was placed on a counter, and the comment was, "no really?" and then, "well, that's what you get for F*%$ing with mother nature!"

that's our girl.

sandi and i went to shenzhen back in 1998. shenzhen was nothing like it is now. very few policeman about and no signs anywhere! and we were feeling quite brave when we went. this is the time i fell through the sidewalk, for no apparent reason. because that's what sidewalks in china were like at that time. and sandi hissed at me, "are you alive?" and i said, "i think so!" and she said, "well good, get up, because there is a crowd gathered around you, and they all want your camera!!"

sandi came to our wedding.

we moved quite near to sandi in pokfulam. we could always tell if she was in or not, depending on if her car was at the bottom of her driveway.

and now, she's moved back to the states.

these past few days, watching her dissemble her flat have been difficult. i can remember when she purchased a lot of these things. i can remember when some of the photos were taken. i can remember afternoons sitting around tables, bringing my kids to her flat, introducing them to her. (left: Sandi on Igor's closing night in Hong Kong)

hearing her pronouncements that sebastian no longer looks anything at all like woody harrelson.

it is sad to say good bye to her. but my flat now has her things. i remember her by looking at them.

i have her paper mache dog, now named sniffy.

and i have a suitcase, crammed full of clothes that she'll be back to collect in may.

so i'll be seeing her again.

i’ve got your back, do you have mine?

today i was helping my friend sandi pack.

friend sandi is leaving hong kong after 25 years in our fair city. that might be another blog for another day.

however, at 2.35 i dutifully got up, brushed off my jeans (still tight from Christmas excesses if we are being honest) and rushed down to meet Gary and off we went to pick up the kiddos.

at kennedy school i was greeted by jasper who informed me that "i want to go to karate".

why?

some of you used to giving children the benefit of the doubt might wonder if he was inspired by the Karate Kid, which he saw bits and pieces of the other day.

some of you, who are suspicious and stingy (me) might wonder if the sudden interest in gis and martial arts might be because word has filtered down to jasper that after karate, i often take sebastian for an ice lolly.

whatever, he wanted to do karate. i let him.

sebastian of the big eyes walked up to me and said, "mummy, will you come and pick me up?"

now, i had planned to go back to sandi's, but where are my priorities? i said, "yes".

and the boys skipped off, jasper ecstatic.

then we noticed that jessica, carys' friend, was standing near us, tears streaming down her face. and when i say streaming, i mean STREAMING. poor little poppet. she was immediately surrounded by girlies who asked her what was wrong. and she replied, "my mummy isn't here!"

i pulled out my phone and said, "should we call her, jessica?"

that cheered her up and so i pressed CALL and gave the phone to jessica. who spoke to her mum and then handed the phone to me. while i was talking to her mum, who was about 30 seconds away from the school gates, another mum approached jessica.

i talked to that other mum for a bit. and we said that was one of the great things about kennedy school. how we all have each other's backs.

i went back to sandi's and we did a little bit of work. but soon it was time to pick up my little karate men.

however, we were late.

and as we turned on to sha wan drive, my phone rang. and it was a mum who has had to call me before, my friend Christine.

"hi tess"

"hi Christine…we're just coming!"

"sebastian just asked me, very calmly, if i knew where his mummy was. so i suggested we give you a call."

Forty five seconds later i was cuddling my little man and hearing all about karate.

But Sebastian said to me, "He can't find his mummy."

I called the friend over. He verified his helper was supposed to come and collect him. Or his mum. Neither were there.

I tried calling his mum. No answer.

Gary tried calling the helper. She said she was having a tough time getting to the school and hadn't left yet. Gary and I offered to drop the boy off.

Hilary wasn't kidding when she said it takes a village. Where would we be without those calls, people who stop when they see your child looking troubled, people who stop and take the time from their schedule to help someone else?