down under is a no go

we're not going to brisbane.

the combination of the amount we (over)spent at the icm banquet and things happening at charles' work means that we aren't going to brisbane.

folks, i am fighting hard on this one.

i think i always knew we weren't going. it just seemed too good to be true. i told charles this last night, and that statement hurt him a lot. i didn't mean it to, but hey, how often do we hurt people without meaning to?

i needed this trip. not like the people in the philippines need to get out of poverty, but i needed to see a new country, get a new stamp on my passport, feel new sand under my feet. i needed to feel like i wasn't getting into a rut.

i completely understand why we are not going. i support the decision not to go.

yet. i. am. despondent. and events of this week, small ones, suddenly have taken on mammoth importance all to mean i have a life of boredom, mean nothing to anyone, and a few more things.

i have no idea when the massive pity party will be over. i need to just put on my big girl knickers and get over this. believe me i am trying. i know that we have made the choice, the only choice that at the end of the month (if not day) is the only one i can live with. so we give up a trip…so people's lives are changed for the better. i can do this. and i will. i just have to get over the idea that i am frumpy, boring and in a rut. give me a couple of days.

more soon.

xo

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9 Replies to “down under is a no go”

  1. I adore you, and am proud of you. I also hope you can find something or someplace to fill that need, and still follow through on the commitment you’ve made to enrich the lives of others.
    xoxo

    Reply

  2. it’s a party! i’ll join you! can i add that the most excitement i’ve had in months is attempting to fix my refrigerator (and failing so far, btw). you pick the vid, i’ll bring the popcorn.

    Reply

  3. Mo aka Maureen aka Grandmother aka Mum December 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

    Just plain proud of you and Charles, honey. But I know you still feel wretched for the time being. Praying that will be over soon. Much love, M xox

    Reply

  4. DadakaGDad Blake December 2, 2008 at 11:52 pm

    And in Australia Nicole Kidman is in deep doldrums as she knows I won’t be there for Christmas.
    What is it with Women, travel and Australia???
    Love to all…..Dad

    Reply

  5. Maybe some Dora knickers would be as cheerful as big girl knickers.

    Reply

  6. sorry to hear Tess,, you deservea holiday and I am sure that 2009 will bring it to you in one form or another!! come to Canada for the holidays 🙂 just a suggestion. xo

    Reply

  7. Hey stranger, how have you all been? I’ve hardly written. I’d say I’m in a remission, for about the last year. It’s amazing the ups and downs I’ve had. Need to fill you in on my church situation too. Maybe you and MC can shed some light on it too.

    Reply

  8. HUGE BUMMER!!! So sorry!!! You’ll get over it soon…but don’t feel guilty for being bummed that you aren’t going..you are allowed a few to wallow… miss you lots..lyns

    Reply

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ABOUT AUTHOR
WANTED FOR BLOGGING

a 34 year old mother of four.

RECENT POSTS
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down under is a no go

Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
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Reader interactions

9 Replies to “down under is a no go”

  1. I adore you, and am proud of you. I also hope you can find something or someplace to fill that need, and still follow through on the commitment you’ve made to enrich the lives of others.
    xoxo

    Reply

  2. it’s a party! i’ll join you! can i add that the most excitement i’ve had in months is attempting to fix my refrigerator (and failing so far, btw). you pick the vid, i’ll bring the popcorn.

    Reply

  3. Mo aka Maureen aka Grandmother aka Mum December 2, 2008 at 9:47 pm

    Just plain proud of you and Charles, honey. But I know you still feel wretched for the time being. Praying that will be over soon. Much love, M xox

    Reply

  4. DadakaGDad Blake December 2, 2008 at 11:52 pm

    And in Australia Nicole Kidman is in deep doldrums as she knows I won’t be there for Christmas.
    What is it with Women, travel and Australia???
    Love to all…..Dad

    Reply

  5. Maybe some Dora knickers would be as cheerful as big girl knickers.

    Reply

  6. sorry to hear Tess,, you deservea holiday and I am sure that 2009 will bring it to you in one form or another!! come to Canada for the holidays 🙂 just a suggestion. xo

    Reply

  7. Hey stranger, how have you all been? I’ve hardly written. I’d say I’m in a remission, for about the last year. It’s amazing the ups and downs I’ve had. Need to fill you in on my church situation too. Maybe you and MC can shed some light on it too.

    Reply

  8. HUGE BUMMER!!! So sorry!!! You’ll get over it soon…but don’t feel guilty for being bummed that you aren’t going..you are allowed a few to wallow… miss you lots..lyns

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

ABOUT AUTHOR
WANTED FOR BLOGGING

a 34 year old mother of four.

RECENT POSTS
BREAD AND THE BAD BIT

Are sandwich letters a bad thing? You know sandwich letters, you’ve received one before, everyone has. They’re an impersonal form of rejection. Think back to

More precious than silver

Love comes in many forms. It isn’t my dad’s birthday, and it certainly isn’t Father’s Day, but today I want to dedicate my blog to

ohhh…THAT blue dress girl

monica lewinsky was on the cover of a magazine the other day. she is a person i have a great deal of sympathy for. bill

Water: essential or a loved luxury?

when i first moved to hong kong in may 1997, charles and i were had student loans and virtually no capital. his contract was ending

Face it, its a facelift

This weeks’ cover of people magazine sees hollywood babes denigrate plastic surgery. they all do. yet no one is getting older in that celluloid, cellulite